You find gloves & a catheter kit in your car and you don't think twice about it.
When you have your head on your man's chest and you immediately notice his heart beat and you start listening for the lub-dub just to make sure his ticker is working properly.
You care more about your feet being
comfortable and pain free than how cute your work shoes are. Whoever
said pain is the price you pay for beauty has obviously never stood
on their feet for 12 hours straight.
Sent from heaven!!!
Almost every joke that you tell is some how medical or science related and none of your friends get it but you still laugh uncontrollably at your own joke.
During a boring conversation, you completely miss what the other person is saying because you are now staring at their arm thinking "Would you look at that vein...I
could hit it with a butterfly easily."
You find that your stomach doesnt get quite so many butterflies, you dont break into a nervous sweat, and you dont immediately start brainstorming for an excuse to get out of it (you think about what skills you havent gotten signed off in your passport book first) when your clinical instructor or nurse asks you to do a skill involving the lower regions.
You have now come to the realization that pretty much everything you did in clinicals first semester was what the CNA does...thank god for that.
Clinical has now turned into a man hunt for the worst patient possible just so you will have a higher chance of being able to stick someone.
Classmates are now bragging about what skills they've done.
Your clinical instructor now laughs at you if you ask them if you need to be signed off before you can give oral meds by yourself.
When your chest feels weird you immediately get your stethoscope out to make sure your heart and lung sounds are still normal.
But unfortunately, I've still only used my bandage scissor to open my mayonnaise packet at lunch.
I have realized lately that love is contagious and it is definitely in the air. The last two months, love
to me was the six foot blonde with thin muscular legs, flat stomach,
perfect boobs, and every nail polish color in the world. I cringed at the site of couples holding hands. I saw this nasty white-trash couple sticking their tongues down each others throat in the cleaning section of HEB and contemplated throwing laundry detergent & bleach at them. I grew warts, turned into a witch, & hopped on my broomstick anytime someone mentioned their significant other. I wanted to cast a hate spell on anyone that got to shower their lover in beautiful romantic love all day, every day. I contemplated hiding in my bed under the covers until this storm of love passed through town. Being stuck in the middle of a thunderstorm of love when your boyfriend is at basic training for the coast guard, on the other side of the country, without a cell phone, for two whole months is like breaking each joint in your fingers one at a time, very very very slowly.
Luckily, God hit me on the head with a ginormous jealousy stick, knocking the jealousy monster right out of me and sending me a very important message. He has equipped me with all the supplies & material to now pass on this message to all of you about love, positivity/hope, & jealousy.
Love is so much more than just a word or a feeling. Love is a comfort blanket that God uses when he chooses to not calm the storm, but to let the storm rage while he calms the child. God wants us to love each other. Hell he wants us to shower each other in love, so that for better or worse, we have love as a support system, our comfort blankets. Most importantly, there is so much love to be given and received in this world that there is no room for childish silly jealousy. And that there is no place for negativity when it comes to love.
1 John 4:7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.
Love is so many different things to so many different people. Love to me is when my insides start boiling over with excitement, twirling around in
circles like a 5 year old, jumping up and down, prancing, giggling,
uncontrollable grinning, tears of joy, & bear hugs. Feeling like you have
so much love in your heart that you just want to shower someone with it
constantly. You can ask Breton about my love because he has first hand experience with my bounty bouncing squealing never ending love for anything cute & adorable. Just ask me about a kitty cat! One time we played charades with a group of friends and he drew my name out of the hat. And to imitate me, he jumped up and down and skipped...everyone knew who it was instantly and I, of course, was mortified because I am completely oblivious to the fact that I apparently do this all the time. My point is that one kind of love is the love that one feels for their soul mate. Yes, I am a firm believer in fairy tales and happily ever afters. Einstein did say "If you want your children to be intelligent read them fairy tales." But I am also a believer in that God gave us all soul mates.
I know this couple who are 93 years old and have been married 69 years.
Isn't that amazing? You just don't see people in love like that anymore.
I want that!!!!!
There is also another type of love... love for one another. John 15:9-17As the Father has loved me, so have
I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will
abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide
in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in
you, and that your joy may be full. “This is my commandment, that you
love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this,
that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if
you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the
servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you
friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to
you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you
should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that
whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These
things I command you, so that you will love one another.
Everyone has friendships that are filled with love. My girlfriends are
the shoulders I cry on, shared uncontrollable laughter, the ones that
keep me standing when I seem to be falling, shared secrets, help me plot
revenge, the ones who will cry with me during sad movies, the hands
that hold mine, never ending advice & opinions, and the best part is that the accept my weirdness.
Most importantly, we must not forget to always love one another... even those that are not your "friends" because we are brothers and sisters.
Galatians 5:13 For you were called to freedom,
brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh,
but through love serve one another.
So I want every one to go out there and tell someone that you love them. Yell from the roof tops how much you love them. Smile & wave at people because even that small act of kindness can brighten someone's day.
Song of Solomon 8:6-7 Set me as a seal upon
your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death,
jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the
very flame of the LORD. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can
floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his
house, he would be utterly despised.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8Love
is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or
rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or
resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the
truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass
away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass
away.
I feel as if I repeat these above phrases to my heart multiple times a day & I am absolutely sick of my heart...well not my entire heart...but I'm kicking portions of my heart out!!
Come & get it you heartless people!
Free heart portions for everyone!
I thank you God so much for blessing me with such a GINORMOUS FREAKING HEART but it's causing more problems that it does good.
Exhibit A: Dancing with the Stars season finale
I LOVE Donald Driver and I have wanted him to win from the beginning. But how can you not also love Katherine Jenkins...she's adorable & sweet as sugar & goodness she cries so much & everyone can tell she just wants it so badly! So long story short, they announce Donald as the winner & I am frantically jumping up and down and screaming and fist pumping and basically look like an idiot in my living room alone. My celebration goes on for all of 10 seconds, when poor sweet as sugar Katherine Jenkins dawns on me & I return to sitting on the couch with my knees in my chest thinking about how awful this must feel for Katherine. I mean no one likes 2nd place and she wanted it so so so bad. Next thing I know, I'm in bed with the covers over my head, have completely forgotten Donald even exists, sobbing because I feel Katherine's pain, like I'm freaking classical singer Katherine Jenkins herself! Like good gosh was all of these tears & depression really necessary...the lady is a famous classical singer surely she's lost before...no one really wins ALL THE TIME...right?? Watch the katherine jenkins video below and it will break your heart!!!!
Exhibit B: Fort Worth Animal Shelter is in danger of euthanizing
I have always been a sucker for strays. Thank god I have never lived alone & been able to take in strays left & right because then the phrase "cat women" would not even begin to describe me. Breton has first hand experience with this and will never let me live it down...the whole reason we ended up with Mia was because while the dog we were going to rescue was getting shots, Mia ran out of her cage and Breton had to chase her around the shelter for 10 minutes. By the time he caught her, he was winded and glaring at me (I was the one who sent him on this wild goose/Mia chase) but little Mia was just smiling with her tongue hanging out. And I knew she was meant for us...so now we have little piggy Mia! But any whoooo, the Fort Worth Animal Shelter has tooooo many pets sooooooo please please please go and rescue some doggies! The thought of those poor animals getting euthanized just kills me! I've been begging my dad for a couple days now to save a kitty or doggy and i've just been trying so hard!!!!
Exhibit C: The attack of the homeless
When I see a homeless person, I purposely avoid even looking in their general direction because I'll start crying and god forbid hand over my credit card. Images of darkness, rain, hard concrete, snow, starvation, & dirtiness just fly through my mind for the rest of the day. I want to do everything I can to help them. I donate to the salvation army. I've served in the soup kitchen. I've helped out at a clinic & have done health screenings. I pray every night that god will help these people... partly because my poor heart cant take any more breaking at the site of another homeless person multiple times a day since I live in San Antonio.
And Im not even talking about just living homeless beings...I even feel bad for a lonely shoe on the side of the road because it was all by itself, without its other partner to make it a pair (thank you New Girl). I dont even throw away the sock that doesnt have its other partner to make it a pair...I put it unpaired back in my sock drawer just because I feel bad for it and dont want it to feel homeless and lonely. Hoping that in that sock drawer the other socks will make it feel better.
Exhibit D: Bipolar Fighting
I am extremely good at starting fights but horrible at actually carrying out the fight. One second I will be in a "throwing dog leashes, yelling anything I can think of" kind of rage then the next second I'm saying "Okay nevermind, can I just have a hug & then can we go eat." And this mood change is driven solely by the fact that my heart is too big to stay mad & turns into a trembling wimp the minute a fight starts up. Well this might seem fine and dandy to all of you "Love not war" type of people but it really really really sucks for me! I literally cannot be mad at someone even if they did do something mean, giving me a legit reason to be mad at them. Its so bad that I befriend the people that everyone else defriended! Yeah that's right, that annoying nerdy kid, who constantly has buggers hanging out of their nose and breaths so loud you'd think they just ran a marathon and follows you around constantly...yeah, thats my BFF!! All because my ginormous heart feels soooo incredibly bad for that single person...FAIL!
7:00 PM- I HATE YOU! DIE!!!!
7:01 PM- CAN WE JUST CUDDLE NOW
Exhibit E: Schedule Smedule
For those of you who are not a nurse or have no nursy friends, nurses have a schedule and you have to stick to that schedule or pop up notifications tell you that you are behind schedule everytime you log onto meditech (nursing documentation program on computers) & then you have to explain why you were behind schedule and "sorry I have a big heart & I cant tell my chatty patient to shut up because I have 3 other patients to get to" is not in the F11 drop down menu!!!!!! Believe it or not this happens to me on a regular basis. During clinicals, multiple nurses have had to ask me to hurry up because I was making them late and behind schedule allllll because I talk and care too much!!! One nurse actually gave me tips on what I can say to get out of a tough situation with a chatty patient so that you can hurry along to your next patient and avoid the pop up notifications. It's sad that this is what the world has come to but apparently I'm going to have issues come December when I am in the real nursing world with my own schedule to follow and answer to. Go figure, I'll probably be explaining how the heart pumps blood to the rest of the body to one patient while my other patient is coding on me next door alllll because I dont have enough guts to say "Sorry, Ill have to answer your question at another time." Welllll thats too dramatic, I'd be able to handle that scenario but you get what I'm saying. Dear God, please shut my heart up so that I wont feel bad for telling patients that I will have to get back to them because I have other stuff to do.
Do you see how all of this is too emotionally exhausting?
Hello friends...I got a new blog!!!!! Here is my very first post :)
You know those days when you think things cant get worse...and then they get worse. Well I have those a lot because I have incredibly bad luck but I try to keep in mind that...
Sometimes god calms the storm...
Sometimes he lets the storm rage and calms his child.
Over my years filled with bad luck, I have been blessed to find the little things that bring me joy because we all know that the little things are the most important. So from there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere... and these funny things help me keep my sanity.
Here are my little funny things that bring me so much joy...
1. They say a dog is a man's best friend. This is my little Mia and I love her because she does very strange things like this that make me laugh...
We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours. We join up with them & fall into mutual weirdness & call it love. -Dr. Seuss
2. Be the kind of women that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh crap, she's up" ....... Well this statement is rather true before I have my morning coffee. God bless my...
3. I love standing in the shower and just smothering my face in this stuff!!! It has beads in it that just explode all over your face and wake you up like the sun freaking slapped you...its awesome! Try it!
4. I constantly try to remind myself to keep calm & ignore junk food but I can NEVER get this concept through my stubborn head. I see junk food and I start hyperventilating and flapping my arms like a humming bird! All I think about is smothering my face in this chocolate cake and throwing back as many french fries as I possible can... you'd think I'd be a whale by now.
5. Thank god that I am addicted to running since he blessed me with such an eating habit. And I like the phrase "you are only one work out away from a good mood" because its soooo true! It also gives me alone time with myself...time to get all the crazy insane thoughts out of my head & the extra energy.
"Running trains me to be a stronger person. Running trains me to refuse to allow my environment to determine my actions. I have never breathed so hard, felt so strong, or faced such challenge as when I am running. Running trains me to keep going always."
6. Sitting in my bed watching all the shows on my DVR is absolutely positively my favorite thing to do. I literally cannot live without my DVR box... especially because I watch about 10 TV show series and Sunday nights most of those shows are on at the exact same time...and god forbid I have to chose between watching Army Wives & Desperate Housewives since they are on at the same time on different channels...DVR prevents playing favorites!!!!
